Sometimes life is like tea, all kinds of taste, only you know.
I used to be very sunshine, now I am so sad. Only know why to live so tired … … now, people around me, do not know how to deal with the face … … get used to a person, like a person … do not know when to start like Quiet, in love with silence … Found myself really changed! Its time has changed, but also changed me! I always thought I was a very strong person, but I still did not imagine the strong……
Tears, on the dead of night, listening to sad music, secretly crying
At night, sometimes want to sleep, cranky, delayed sleep!
But sometimes, somehow woke up from the dream, want to cry, and so cry, as if everything is inexplicable…
The people around me come and go, look up, take confident steps, and I’m down…
I hope to live a simple, hate complex, but now life is not complicated, why I feel annoying, disgusted…
A good heartache may happen in the right and wrong, I can only keep silent! My heart is so painful, hurt, and so sorry. Always tell myself to be strong, tears are always disappointing flow down. Drop of tears is the heart cannot tell the taste … … so painful, so sad. So lost so helpless, so degenerate, I really want to avoid such a life!
The flower that blooms in adversity is the rarest and most beautiful of all.
An essential element of any art is the risk. If you don’t take a risk then how are you going to make something really beautiful, that hasn’t been seen before?
Thought to leave, but I cannot!
I: “My family, when you are paying for me, I do not know how to be grateful, complaining about that complains, complaining, I’m always unhappy, I’m not on purpose.” I’m sorry! I just saw someone else to give me an accident Xipai led to a lifetime may not get up the disease, the result of this price too much! Brain trauma was epilepsy, left brain injury, resulting in inflexible hands and feet, language skills impaired, because of this disease I cannot study hard, childhood dreams – will be shattered at the university has always thought that learning ability to succeed, knowledge change the fate! Very sorry! You know this because I bear how much damage it? How much loss? There are many other I do not want to mention, you do not know, you really do not know, because of it all too far away from you! When I tried to create my wonderful tomorrow with both hands, I found my hand inflexible. When I wanted to use my mind to create my future, I found that my head had been hurt! What am I going to compete with others, what to compete with others! What else can be used as capital? When I think of the future, I cannot think too much or dare to plan my own future because I cry…
All this is really ironic!
Formerly, I was not afraid of anything, has been moving forward, now I have no confidence, what to do, I feel that they will not, do not understand anything, a little confidence … … and even my family did not have to me Confidence, and this I can still feel it, take me to find a job, my dad said I only fit for simple work, complicated to do, over time I also think I can only do simple things, For example, I want to change jobs, I told my dad I found a Porter job, a monthly salary of about 5000, my dad said that you are in that original factory work, listen to me, or you even work to find Not! I’m really disappointed to hear it! I said to my father that I have been so big, if you still have to listen to your life, I really too failed! My job now is to arrange the school graduation, I have resigned, but come back to this factory, has never done any other work, I have no confidence .I am now in the factory although I do a process inside the factory first, but after all, I have a lot of places hands flexible than others, low self-esteem feel more a sense of accomplishment, and I am in this plant also had to catch my boss, but I still did not leave in, think about it really is a failure, I I know you even think I did not hope that I hope you pay more attention to me! So I have to be motivated! I desperately want to prove myself, I just want to fight, I do not want to be your burden, I do not want others to say they have no ability, I want to those who do not like me, to make some achievements for them to see, I want to tell them. I am also great!
My time story, the rough life, experienced what most people have never had the struggle and helplessness? What is the strength of the trough of life to support me to go bravely for the sake of life? I believe my life will be brilliant because of them! I would like to share with people! I never really wrote a space in my log, I was thinking how to start, and how to say Looked back over the past nineteen years, fierce look back, I cried! Actually check out so many out of my tears, pain, wounds, as well as suffered humiliation, the wrong way to regret … Although the memory can cover up, Looking back at the heart of the pain is hidden in the depths of my heart for a long, long time ……
If born can choose. I’d rather not be born
When I was young, there was always a dream in which my parents departed bizarrely. However, such dreams always wet their pillows. The kind of frightened and fearful mood that every child can understand! In the early hours of June 15, 1993, when I was born into this world, the sky was still raining and the child’s heart was crying. I was naked, letting the rain flap, and the “woman ” went a long way … I did not know what she thought at the time, making her a decision. Do not assume the obligation to raise children, I do not know because of what annoyed them, is not my distress? Will you not dislike me? What is unspeakable or hidden? But I think, no matter what, you should not abandon me as soon as I was born, and when the weather was still raining, did not give me a piece of clothes to put me away from the roadside … … cannot help but feel sad God hurt!
Ever understand that when you know that you had abandoned her, how sad they will be sorry! Because it is you who took me to this beautiful world, and you who strangled me, I would rather you did not bring me to this world. Is it because of how much pain I am going to bear? When you see other parents with their children, family happiness of smiles, you know me what to think, but I can only silently with tears, I do not know why so cruel to abandon me! In others, other children’s eyes I am an alternative, a child without parents, students bully themselves, make fun of them, to leave their indelible shadow, trauma! All of this is all you guys are “good” guy, are these guys should be what it should do? Do not you feel ashamed? So to me, cruel will flesh body, discarded in the dirt road, let me in the storm destroyed! Although my life originates from you, you have no right to manipulate my life and death! I hate you……
There is always a way out
God did not make me die, but fortunately, I met good-hearted people – my father. I am grateful to my dad for kindly adopting my non-kin strangers (who themselves have a son and a daughter) and gave me a home for me to have a bunch of good kin so that I have the rights of mom and dad to succeed My life, Meticulous care of me, take care of me without complaint, care for me, love me, treat me as the same as the children of their own lives! Not the same blood, but it gives the same love!
When I was born, one of our provincial TV series “The Bride of Xiamen” was aired. There was a man named Liao Fuqi in the movie. Maybe the village people may think that my father’s income is considerable, Immortality will have after birth. It is really blessing to say that I was adopted by them, and they call me blessing. But I did not give them blessings, brought them a bunch of trouble, I feel that they are an absolute cumbersome, they did not because I grew proud and proud, but they are brought It is disappointment again and again. Sometimes I quarrel with you because of trivial matters. When I look at their bad faces, I am relieved to say “I’m treating you as my family when I speak to you loudly.”
Life is like a beautiful melody, only the lyrics are messed up.
It is better to be beautiful than to be good. But. it is better to be good than to be ugly.
Parents quarrel, the child’s pain.
Dear father and mother, home and everything Xing! You always quarrel, my heart is very scared, you do not go on like this! Quarrel cannot solve the problem but only plagues. Just as my grandma said, “Well, too, is not that good?” Just like Grandpa said, “I’ve never quarreled with your grandmother, what a good noisy family”
Your long-term state of feeling is not good, I see in the eyes, the pain in my heart! My heart seems to be always hanged like, I do not know how to do it, advised not to persuade, I constantly blame myself why so stupid, if from a clever point you can stop … and finally evolved into parents quarrel is caused by their own …… character introverted and repressed your relationship is intrinsically linked …… Every time I see another family together, family harmony and happiness smile, I cannot see for a long time, because I know I Will cry …
Childhood school time, thank a teacher tough love.
Primary school, I was poor student, I have no credits, no, no … … I am naughty, I like to play video games, sitting in the last row of the old, not listening attentively to class, often by the teacher station, the old job is not right The teacher stayed home late, was accused, was beaten palm …
But I am naughty, in school, but it is very listening to the teacher’s words, but also respects the teacher. It really shame to say, since my primary school, my academic performance is particularly poor, my parents rarely care about my study, in fact, no use, when I did not know what happened when I was studying, but also that reading is Just like I did when I was in elementary school, I was on the last place in the class! Now I think of my face a bit hot. Until one day, being stimulated to the people, my heart is not the taste, then I thought, cannot let people see flat themselves, I have to let her know that poor students can become eugenics. From the fourth year of primary school, I began to make a determined effort to catch up. Every morning and evening, I became very energetic and energetic, and my study also advanced by leaps and bounds. In the final exam of the sixth grade of primary school, I had a gratifying 183 points in my math’s math test… Unfortunately, failed to allow key secondary schools to admit … … I want my father to study in the county because I think the education in the county came better than in rural areas. But my daddy did not let her keep thinking is: as long as you have the heart to study, the bad school can produce the talents.While it is true, it is clear that he neglected the importance of a good school to the students …
Secondary school time, the environment eroded my heart.
So I can only choose the rural middle school, entered a no threshold, as long as three or four hundred dollars to pay tuition fees can attend. The high school also has good memories, but it seems bad memories more. I think it is very important for a student to choose a good school. I think it is very important for a student to meet a good principal. I think it is very important for a student to meet a good teacher. However, just did not let me meet. As far as my school is concerned, I feel that today’s teachers regret that this school does not have everything in order to improve the school enrollment rate and to unfairly treat the students’ future and schooling. Student. For all students, for all students! At an inexplicable placement test, I was more satisfied with the result of the test but was divided into what was considered to be the worst class recognized by the school and one of my classmates was worse than me Points in a good class, I baffled. I do not accept such a distribution, but helpless can only accept, so helpless stay in the poor class.
This class did not have to say, is simply no organization and discipline, poor learning, tired of school mood. The teacher impatient to teach (teach our English teacher is the canteen owner, often go back and fill the fast food … …) The number of late arrivals and more … … I almost collapsed this learning atmosphere … … At first, I also had the heart to study to know the importance of learning, but as time passes, but without the academic record … maybe in this class to stay too long, be assimilated!
Then I, dejected.
It is a pity that those who have encountered the wrong school in this wrong school, middle school dorm quarters are a bully and the scared person who always bullies us. As for how to bully the law, I will not say that. I remember once he was injured, I called my father, I cried, “give me a school change, I promise to study seriously. Otherwise, do not let me read” I know he was the next How determined, I am serious. But my words did not get my father’s support; he did not listen to my words. At that time, my mood was very heavy. I complained to my father and complained that he did not value my study. I lost my motivation to learn. Since then, I began to rebel. Once abandoned school, no schooling.
Bed accident. Destructive blow.
One day, I was laying my bed upstairs, the dorm room was running around with a roommate, and I was just getting up and folding the quilt, and they ran over and should be careless I pushed from behind, and I fell down from the two-meter-high bed. The first one went to the ground, the hazy, and the sharp pain. At that time, I still fainted. At that time, my head was swollen, There was an anomaly, the first mouth involuntarily open, the hands and feet jitter in the middle, keep pumping, then frequent attacks, a few minutes intervals attack, even every time you sit down and will attack, walking are difficult, but also There have been people helping. At that moment, as if the end of the world
When I went to the hospital to do a brainwave test, when I took the report, the result of the examination was “tonic, epilepsy,” the moment I panicked, when I did not know how to read that epilepsy, but a look Kind of ominous premonition, when I was in the hospital placed small healthy epilepsy card to see such a word “Please patient confidence in the victory over the disease, do not give up on yourself,” I told you, when I was scared, I feel like The loss of incurable disease. When the doctor let me know what is epilepsy, tell me how to cure, how long it takes to heal, give me medication, became the later medicine jar, at that time it was as if it was broken by the sky, I could not tell myself How sad, how terrified, and how much helpless … When I knew that because of epilepsy that traumatic brain injury, I almost crazy, I hate that person, how much I want to rush to crazy him flat one pause……
I am not neurotic!
How many times the former gaffe, how many times by others with a strange vision to look at themselves, how many times people around laughing? … At that time I hate the most physical education, and others are playing in groups, but I was a person wandering around the corner of the campus. I am obscure, no one notices my being, I am superfluous … I do not know which day I am afraid to look up, deep helplessness torment me when I face all this Fear, no one knows. Can you understand the despair that a man knelt on the ground, his classmates helped, and refused to get up? Can you imagine a picture of a person weeping every day?
My heart’s pain is so violent, the body’s vicious cycle, melancholy, family disputes, usually listlessness, learning also due to various reasons unsatisfactory, when I know the test scores in the exam, the mood fell to the extreme, mad to fight his own head, Cried, I know what it means … Tears form a spring fountain, I saw my tired body and mind. For a moment, I want to come back again, but it is forever.
I do not want to be defeated!
Epilepsy in the eyes of normal people is not much suffering, but the immersive people know it’s terrible, if I can come out, I do not want to go back to thank this suffering, regardless of the twists and turns of this life gave me the band How rare to come to realize, but I would rather not realize the day without epilepsy.
The first work experience, a thousand words cannot say
2010, 5.10 … I entered a factory, I started the first journey I work, happened quite a lot of things …  partners have entered another workshop because my right hand is not flexible was called out … I just a People, and people feel different look at themselves with a strange look, that while the old cry, the mood is so much loss so also inferior, after all, people think I will slowly because of the right hand to make excuses for not flexible Then one day a man said sharply to Curcuma: Do not use his right hand inflexible as an excuse, his right hand is not flexible, you win over it, or else the leader will see you slowly curse you, even though he may not say that mouth will In my heart read about … After listening to his words and later also think a lot, then look back once had people say to yourself, “You are the slowest,” “I do not know what can be arranged for you to do.” “I really do not know what you can do” My heart is not tasted… people look downright never mind? Curcuma told me in my heart that “I will not give myself a chance to say myself.” Later, I finally proved myself no worse than others, but the best I can do twice as much as I do, but also put on the whole plant The first hat, that is so gratified, I responsible for their own Le … Also here to pay their own labor results, sweat in exchange for remuneration, so that I can earn money life is not easy, honed myself, let myself Change strong …
On the future how to do, in fact, I am at a loss.
A year and a half at home, doing nothing, all day locked in his own small room, this period of time my heart is always constantly struggling. In the face of my previous work, in the face of working hours, I am constantly complaining about the long hours and looking forward to getting off work earlier … Today I lose my job, I am alone at home, I spend time at home, day after day, Consider life, with me how I kind of invisible pressure, I am not an enterprising person! Many words do not know how to say, and who to say my thoughts, a kind of no one support and no one understands the sadness, only from a strong! I am not a child who can have happiness, but I still will complain about the injustice of God, why do I still complain about God’s injustice, why do I suffer from repeated attacks? You cannot have a carefree life with other kids and enjoy simple happiness. I experienced the struggles and helplessness they had not experienced…
Because of pain, so spell seeking relief. Because of despair, so dejection without scruples, from meekness to rebellion, from anger to degeneration. Inner wounds, so many years only I know one person! Working bank- Lin Kam-Yi Leave home father and mother Bring your luggage away Winter heat more care ah Work in the middle of their own break Who called us is a man Always be strong Mo’s father and mother do not bother you To do it is necessary to do a good job Mo sweat and more tears Encounter difficulties Mo sorrow Wind and rain Mo bitter ah Zaiku then tired to carry their own Ah … life will be ambitious. Hard work in mind. When we start successful business ah. Wind scenery back home. Mom and Dad, I will not give you shame
. I grew not. Cannot grow.
I am also a man. I have self-esteem. But if I cannot learn patience. I grew not. Cannot grow. How successful. On June 28, 2012, our team leader gave us the task. I’m afraid I could not finish it myself, so I chose even class. The shopkeeper went away, leaving me alone, as well as the group manager sitting at his desk.
Tube: Jin instrument, off work, go to eat.
I Thank you for your concern! I am not hungry, I am hungry, and I will go to eat! Group control you go eat!
Group control: people are iron, rice is steel, a meal hungry panic, do eat not! If hungry, although I do not have to bear the responsibility, the company wants, I have for the sake of the company! Me: I am really not hungry, I will eat hungrily, I will take care of the body! Group management let me work here! (I feel like I’m not mistaken, but the group manager is angry, he walks behind and closes my work lamp)
Group control: you are not sick ah, told you to eat you do not eat, do not force my shot! (A look angry, clenched fist)
Me: Discuss it, really let me work here.
Group control: fuck you, you do not go away! I care about your work faster! You do not listen to me, why are you doing in my workshop! I: heart ideal method (when I heard these words and feeling great grievance, I feel sad and ridiculous hard at work you do not praise me any problem, you say that’s the case, you call me does not matter! But annoying you scolded my mom. Also rushed to go! Is gas not angry? Gas! And I work there is no less than people, the benefits can reach nearly 20 per hour, the collar is 7 dollars, I Complain about it? Today also suffered such a deal! Still kept neither saying that the company for the sake of their own words and deeds nor checkpoint! That the workshop itself? Is only a working Mody) I: I respect you, do not tell you Noisy, please respect me, can you?
Group control: If you are noisy with me, then you do not do, why in my workshop! Less talk about the truth with me, fewer creations speak! That’s the way society is. I: I want you to reclaim the phrase “Fuck your mother,” said to me sorry! Group management; how, how can you take me, how can you Name! Me: I did not do anything wrong, you scold me, curse or my mom, what are your reasons! Group control: You say a few words to see if I do not hit you (and furious menacing fist) I: (I am not going to go on, I endure! I think the consequences will be like! I think my older brother once told me that “outside is someone else to say, you have to endure! The process of enduring Painful, but the harvest is sweet! Think of dad said, “loss is blessed” think of grandpa said “some tube, is a good thing” I did not tell him truer, but my heart is indignant, my heart is not tasted, I am young and fit, I also Will be angry! I cannot calm down to face.
Lonely, lonely, helpless. !
Lonely, lonely, helpless. ! However, still wandering alone. Tired, painful, but had to continue to persevere, want to give up, want to stay away! Why is not a gust of wind, blowing like: why not a shower of rain, after the sky is clear: why not air, at least people need: Why is just an unknown person? A man who is self-reliant in a complex society … reality is too realistic. Reality cannot afford what to expect! What happened when I fell? Get up and keep walking. Injured how? Hold back the pain or have to face it with a smile. Tired and how? What can you afford? Also no one with their share! Do not say I am as fragile as a glass bottle, do not underestimate me, people who have not experienced do not understand! You may not be stronger than me when you’re on the verge of it. Another strong person will have an emotional collapse and the day the outbreak, cry, just because too strong for too long! I dare to cry for public occasions, I am real temperament! Strong behind, who can understand? Just want to quietly reach the pole time, really thought of giving up, give up, and give up this world, into a gust of wind. The drop of water. But there is no courage to give up everything, there is too much sadness, too much unwilling to … … life is still continuing, life is still continuing, the future is still waving, and the days have to continue! Now I live a very calm, two-point life, nine to five jobs, although income, although I have not found a direction, I really want to fly in the broader sky to live out their true self!
You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.
You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.
Family’s love, let me strong drops after every injury!
In each and every one of our lives there are two people who love us the closest to us, growing up from time immemorial, even when we do not understand them. To pay for their love for you, the fate to be me not thin, give me such a parent, I can do is to honor them well. In fact, I always felt that they owe them too much in my heart, I am immersed in their own world all day sad inside, I always feel unfortunate, did not take time to care about their families, but I do not want you! Now I still have this disease, silly me, these years let you burden too much, sorry. Remember once, I think life is meaningless, I think of the end, I think no one in this world nostalgia, no one is in love with me, I did the first thing to say goodbye to my father, that day I made an SMS to the father. I clearly remember my father heard this hurriedly came to me, enlighten me and comfort me! Dad said 〃 if one day I lost the ability to work 〃 not self-reliant 〃 he will raise my whole life. When I heard this sentence, I was moved to speechless, touching my life’s moment 〃 big teardrop roll down from the corner of his eye 〃 I really read the meaning of the word father, I kneel On the ground burst into tears, the first time I felt there are people in this world nostalgia, is the love of the family with each I miss a moment. Thank you for everything you did for me. I will cheer up, I understand how hard my life will be bumpy, even in this process will encounter many suffering setbacks, I do not fear because my life is you give me, I will never forget Thanks for your nourishment! I told myself “No matter what I will become, no matter what happens in the future, but you will not let your family worry about it! If one day I did not have the ability to work, I will not allow them to pay me because in this life owes you so much!
I hope the future of their own
Wise! Confidence! Strong! Mature! Then it is best to have a certain wealth base, because filial piety is also built on the basis of wealth, there is what the family needs, no matter what, try to give! Forget what should be forgotten, to remember what should be remembered, to be able to change, to accept what cannot be changed, to live a completely new ego and calmly face everything in life and pursue the wonderful life that should have been! Ten years later, I hope I can grasp what I want, every day I will be in the pursuit of hard work, perseverance!
I want to be full of life!
I am Lin Kam-you! My tomorrow will be better!
Thank you for reading, I wish a happy life, happiness forever with my friends leave your words!
Friends of the language will inspire me ∞,
My friend’s words are like a bright candle, illuminating my life.
Friends leave your name!
In this way, a few years or even decades later, when I opened the log,
I will recall that those who have so many years care about me loved me, my friend, leave your name Oh!